Throughout life, you’ll discover personal attributes that frustrate, challenge, or maybe even disgust you. Perhaps your eyes aren’t the color you’d like, or your nose is a little wider than most. Maybe you’ve always wanted to be tall or maybe your foot size makes it difficult to find shoes in your size. Perhaps your wide hips have been something you’ve always wrestled with or the thin frame that everyone else admires, you would trade any day. What can you do to accept your body just the way it is?
If you have found yourself struggling with loving the skin you are in, then consider these action tips designed to help you learn to LOVE the skin you are in:
Accepting your body image is so important to your everyday existence. When you can say, “I’m okay just the way I am,” you’ll lead a calmer, more settled, and happier life.
Often we spend countless hours focusing and even fretting over our relationships with other people, asking ourselves countless questions about other people (i.e. do they like me, will they call me, what are they thinking, how can I impress them...)
While it is important to regularly examine our relationships and put in the work to ensure they are healthy and strong...even more important is our relationship with ourselves. How we feel about ourselves matters. How we talk to and about ourselves is important. Believe it or not, the way we feel about ourselves, directly or indirectly impacts every other relationship we find ourselves in.
Let me remind you...everywhere you go, there you are. While you can decide when and how to engage others, the reality is you can never escape you. When you rise, there you are. When you steal away for quiet time, there you are. When you find yourself in a myriad of emotions from day to day, there you are. The reality is you can never escape you.
So, in realizing that, it's more important than ever to regularly examine your relationship with you. Start by asking yourself a few important questions:
LESSONS LEARNED FROM BARBIE
Like so many others around the country, I grew up to be a true Barbie fan. In my recent Book, The Tale of 10 Crowns I talk about how my Barbie collection was vast, and my accessory game was tight including everything from the Barbie Dream House, Motor Home, Corvette Car, and more.
As an only child, I spent countless hours playing with Barbie dolls, and my mother and aunt were very intentional about going out of their way to ensure the dolls within my collection looked like me. While the selection of brown Barbie dolls was very limited for many years, they would seek them out to ensure that I saw myself represented within the diversity of my own personal Barbie world.
As time progressed, Matel began to release "limited edition" Barbie dolls which were set apart in a class of their own. The limited-edition Barbie was unique in design, often admired and always handled with extreme care. Above all, the limited-edition Barbie often gained value over time.
As I reflect on the whole Barbie craze with the release of the new Barbie motion picture blockbuster, I am reminded of how each of us is a limited edition. Each with our unique fingerprint and DNA. We are each set apart with an individual mix of gifts and talents that should be celebrated and fully embraced. Like with limited edition Barbie Dolls, we should be valued and handled with extreme care.
Like a limited-edition Barbie, it's time to stop trying to fit in, and instead embrace the fact that you were designed to stand out. Recognize and celebrate the fact that you are a limited edition!!!
Photo credit: Kimazing Photography
Are you in need of change in one area of life or another? Are you sick and tired or doing the same thing and getting the same results? I'm sure if we are honest there is at least one area of our life that we can use a change. Well, this weekend during the CHANGE HER Women's Conference hosted by Shameka Danieles of CHANGE Church, we were reminded of the importance of evolving as women. Change is tough but it is necessary for those who desire to take hold of everything God has for them. Having a growth mindset and being willing to make small daily changes and tweaks can benefit us in ways unimaginable, but through it all, we must give ourselves grace.
So often, we are looking to others to bring about the change we need instead of looking within. In the words of the late, Indian leader Mahatma Gandhi, Be the change you wish to see in the world. But remember, you don't have to do it on your own.
If you are looking for a tribe of women to walk with, in your quest to evolve, change and grow, consider joining our Beyond Brilliant Network, which is comprised of other clear, confident, and courageous women committed to doing the same - (www.BeyondBrilliantNetwork.com).
If you are looking for someone to help you develop a plan and to hold you accountable in your journey, consider adding me to your team, as your own personal Confidence Coach (www.TheRealNicoleSteele.com).
If you are looking for a place to grow in your faith and to gain real practical tools to help you embrace change and move to new levels, most definitely consider checking out CHANGE Church and Pastor Dharius Daniels, which offers live locations in Atlanta, New Jersey and a virtual program for a global audience -https://www.lifechange.org/
Are you too hard on yourself? We hold onto our shortcomings and conveniently forget our successes and positive qualities. It’s not easy to expect others to respect, like, or love you if you don’t love yourself.
While we find it easy to love others, it’s much more challenging to appreciate ourselves. We often allow others to take advantage of us. We tolerate unhealthy relationships. We overeat. We waste our valuable time. We have goals that are far beneath our capabilities. We place the weight on others to give us the affirmation and approval that is at our fingertips.
As you wrap up this year and prepare your mind for the year ahead, I encourage you to consider doing the following:
Contrary to what many industry experts, courses, programs, workshops, and training sessions would have you believe, I firmly believe that everyone is born with the level of confidence they require to live out their life, their purpose, and their journey.
Let me ask you – Have you ever really noticed a child? When a baby is born he’s free and full of confidence. The baby is confident, when he/she cries for milk, it appears, when he poops, someone appears to clean it up. Have you noticed a toddler, how confident a child is about what he wants, and how he clearly communicates without prejudice or hesitation? Almost till the age of 6-10 years, there is an abundance of self-confidence and effectiveness in communication.
Post that age, we start gathering the baggage of life – every time someone says – “Are you sure?”, “Work hard so you don’t fail”, “You should not fail!”, “A lot depends upon you!”. We feel the fear of failing and slowly start to resist taking on big challenges so as not to face that fear. Over time (years) even though people outside may stop saying it, our mind remembers all the times we failed in something & slowly the self-doubt starts to add layers over and over. Now a confident, outspoken and fully self-expressed child slowly starts to doubt & second guess himself.
We are filled with experiences of failures, rejections and belief in our incompetency. And as there is a need for confidence in the market, and different industries, we are always looking to collect news, and education, we put up a facade of false self-confidence & project it to the world, hoping no one would find out.
However, inside there is a huge conflict between what we are really feeling and what we are pretending to be so that we may be accepted, acknowledged & appreciated. Over time this gap continues to eat us inside, like a termite, and increase the experience of something lacking.
When it comes to achieving your dreams and accomplishing your goals, it is very easy to put the work off until you have all the ducks lined up and are assured everything is going to work out, but does that ever really work? You already know the answer...NO!!!
The reality is no matter how hard we try we can never get everything worked out perfectly. And the reality is while we are trying to do so, we are losing valuable precious time. I challenge you today to rethink your strategy when it comes to achieving your personal goals or obtaining the things that are most important to you. Make a decision today to do the work as if you know everything is going to work out.
QUESTION: What is one thing you can do today to move closer to your goals?
As you jumpstart your week, be aware there will be many things that may come your way to steal your time and distract your mind but remain laser-focused. There is work to do, dreams to fulfill, and a purpose to be pursued. Get in the zone!
Starve your distractions and feed your focus. It's going to be a GREAT week.
Are you often labeled "Team Too Much"? Do those around you frown upon your zeal, passion and excitement? Do you find yourself dimming down your light because others around you are uncomfortable? Well, if you answered "yes" to any of those questions, I encourage you today to pause, take a deep breath in, and keep pushing forward. There is no apology needed as you get up each day and press forward towards the things God has created YOU to do.
You don't need those around you to fully understand what you are doing and where you are going. If God gave you a dream, a vision or instructions, remember you and Him are a majority. Adjust your crown my dear, look yourself in the mirror and remind yourself you have what it takes. Now let's go!